Wednesday, 6 May 2009

Brown Is Dead

No, calm down. He's not dead yet. But he is absolutely dead politically. The evidence? Well not what all the media are raging about. As ever, they are miles off target.

It's not his various policy U-Turns, every day a new one it seems.

It's not that he had to dump McBride and is considering a Night of the Long Knives cabinet reshuffle.

It's not his restless doomed cabinet, who all are so pathetic that they can't bring themselves to plunge the knife in and so resort to the modern politician's old favourite: the well trailed one remark in an otherwise dull speech or interview, which they can 'clarify' later.

It's not that he and his team are completely out of touch with public sentiment (think Gurkhas).

It's not that he has lost a vote in the House (think Gurkhas).

It's not that all his polling is downhill.

It's not that the recession still has more drip, drip, drip bad news for many months to come.

No. It's U-Tube. Watch it again....

Fact 1 - Gordy is a shit public speaker; no rhythm, no delivery, no projection, no humour, no charisma, no character. Nothing. Null. Zero.

Fact 2 - Gordy has no bedside manner. He has no empathy with his audience. When he speaks, he is alien to you. He is like a nervous junior bank clerk who retreats behind formality when telling you that you can't have a loan.

So who the fuck thought putting him on U-Tube would be a good idea? Even Fatty Prescott is mocking him!

The truth is that anything he says is now openly mocked by his own side and the media. He cannot get a good headline anymore. So the strategy is to bypass the media and go direct to the voters on U-Tube, also hoping to make him look cool and hip and relevant by using yoof media (tip - this doesn't work in a buttoned up suit, duh!).

No, this is an act of incredible desperation. The No 10 Bunker has run out of ideas. They are bereft. They have a totally unmarketable product and are having to think of ludicrous ways to market it.

Gordy is dead. It is almost awful to watch. But so much fun.

No comments: